John 15:9-17

15:9 As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love.

15:10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love.

15:11 I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete.

15:12 "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.

15:13 No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends.

15:14 You are my friends if you do what I command you.

15:15 I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father.

15:16 You did not choose me but I chose you. And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name.

15:17 I am giving you these commands so that you may love one another.

Catching Fire!  

Last week we talked about fire as a purifying process... Clearing away the dead wood that is not bearing fruit.  In the passage this week Jesus gets clear about the kind of fruit he wants his disciples to bear. Throughout the gospels he talks about a different way of being in the world. A way that loves even strangers and enemies.  In the beatitudes he offers  a way of a blessed life.  But here he gives a commandment. Love one another that your joy may be complete.  All of this sounds nice and sweet but it seems to me that few people are capable of getting there on a Monday morning and most of them seem a little obnoxious.  Maybe loving each other is more about our honest engagement than our playing some role or putting on a loving face. 

This morning I'm thinking of how the fire in our experience dies. Whether we are talking about relationships or our engagement in a cause, there are some common dynamics. I think of Donna, a wonderful, bright, caring young woman who was volunteering to work with teenagers in a program. She was so loved by the young people that she was offered a position as an assistant. Soon she was attending meetings, planning future programs, working with budgets.  She was taken into the confidence of other leaders and learned of some intractable conflicts between some of the players.  I watched as her joy of interaction and love for the kids began to shift. The job was no longer a gift she was giving to them. She was an employee and she began to feel shame if something didn't go perfectly. Her goal began to shift from enjoyment/joy in the interactions to relieving the distress of having something for them to do.  She put in more hours, began to feel some burnout, developed resentments about others who seemed less committed.  Her inner goal seemed to be shifted again to proving her commitment was greater than others and this required that she suffer.  It was as if she took this passage to mean "if you don't sacrifice your entire life for your job you don't really love these kids."

I see similar dynamics in other relationships.  Funny, how often the joy in the interaction shifts to avoidance of shame or distress or fear.   We don't seem to notice the shift in our inner goal or the impact it has on our feelings. One thing I know.  A life motivated by avoidance of fear or shame is a smoldering wasteland.  Catching fire is always about joy.  

Donna's recovery took awhile.  A burned out forest doesn't recover over night. She had to begin to notice what was happening inside her and begin to be honest about it with a few people. She learned how to let other's minister to her. She began to recognize that her job was about living her love not playing a role or accomplishing a task. She found that the fire of love can return like the Phoenix rising out of the burned out hopes and smoldering dreams.